The Science of Trust: Emotional Attunement for Couples [Unabridged] [Audible Audio Edition]
Author: | Language: English | ISBN: B007QIAKHW | Format: PDF, EPUB
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For the past 35 years, John Gottman's research has been internationally recognized for its unprecedented ability to precisely measure interactive processes in couples and to predict the long-term success or failure of relationships. In this groundbreaking book, he presents a new approach to understanding and changing couples: a fundamental social skill called "emotional attunement," which describes a couple's ability to fully process and move on from negative emotional events, ultimately creating a stronger relationship.
Gottman draws from this longitudinal research and theory to show how emotional attunement can downregulate negative affect, help couples focus on positive traits and memories, and even help prevent domestic violence. He offers a detailed intervention devised to cultivate attunement, thereby helping couples connect, respect each other, and show affection. Emotional attunement is extended to tackle the subjects of flooding, the story we tell ourselves about our relationship, conflict, personality, changing relationships, and gender. Gottman also explains how to create emotional attunement when it is missing, to lay a foundation that will carry the relationship through difficult times.
Gottman encourages couples to cultivate attunement through awareness, tolerance, understanding, non-defensive listening, and empathy. These qualities, he argues, inspire confidence in couples, and the sense that despite the inevitable struggles, the relationship is enduring and resilient.
This book, an essential follow-up to his 1999 The Marriage Clinic, offers therapists, students, and researchers a detailed intervention for working with couples, and offers couples a roadmap to a stronger future together.
Books with free ebook downloads available The Science of Trust: Emotional Attunement for Couples [Unabridged] [Audible Audio Edition]
- Audible Audio Edition
- Listening Length: 16 hours and 25 minutes
- Program Type: Audiobook
- Version: Unabridged
- Publisher: Brilliance Audio
- Audible.com Release Date: April 1, 2012
- Language: English
- ASIN: B007QIAKHW
I wanted to give this book five stars. My shelves are full of relationship books and parenting books (my specialty), and Gottman is prominent among them. Gottman's credibility is essentially unsurpassed, and his work has been enormously influential in both a research and a practical sense. As soon as I heard about The Science of Trust I ordered it, anxiously awaiting an opportunity to delve into Gottman's latest offering. Unfortunately, my five-star hopes were not met.
The book contains valuable information, no doubt. However the book is far too technical for a non-professional audience. For example, Gottman throws around psychological jargon and statistical terms (such as "discriminant function analysis") freely with limited or no explanation for a lay-audience. Additionally, at least three chapters are dedicated to the mathematics and story behind "Game Theory". For the mathematically inclined I'm sure this is great. For those wishing to learn about relationships it is tedious. Even for clinicians/therapists much of the material is superfluous and lacking in immediate practical application.
Gottman's previous offerings (in trade books) have been wonderfully accessible, full of practical detail, and enjoyable to read and talk about. I found the content of the book fell into two categories for me: superb and informative, or dry, tedious, and unnecessary. As such, I believe this book could have been written in around half the pages.
Another quibble that started as a minor one but grew as the book progressed... the number of spelling and grammatical errors was simply breathtaking. The editorial team have shown a lack of attention to detail that was disappointing.
I wish I could give this book more stars.
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